Culture / Humour / News

10 Reasons Not to Be Afraid Of Robots

Meet Robonaut 2.

robonaut2

Robonaut (or “R2” for short) is a humanoid robot designed by NASA to work alongside astronauts in space, performing dangerous or routine tasks so humans won’t have to. Footage of R2 working on the International Space Station was released this week; making him somewhat of an internet sensation.

R2 resembles a human from the waist-up, and has hands, arms and human-like dexterity. He can even do sign language!

roast

If you’re anything like me, then you’re probably a little freaked out by all of this. You might be thinking, gee, this is a great scientific development and all, but what if that robot gets tired of wearing his heavy spacesuit all day and decides he wants my job instead? What if robots start taking all the jobs? Or worse- get their own reality shows. After that, it’s only a matter of time before total world domination.

kard

Your concerns are not without merit.

But if there’s one thing Pop Culture has taught us, it’s that Robots are nothing to be afraid of.*

We should be excited, not scared, about the prospect having a few more Robots around. Here, as evidenced by pop culture, are just a few of the reasons why:

*With the notable exceptions of Decepticons, HAL 9000, Psycho Rangers, and Mario Lopez.

1. They Help You Out of Difficult Situations

R2D2

If our friend R2D2 is any indication, Robots are some tough muthafu*kas. Not only are they incredibly skilled problem solvers, they also kick ass and take names 24/7. Let’s just say that if I ever found myself on the Planet Endor fighting off a legion of Imperial Troops, I’d know who to call.

2. They Make Your House a Home

Rosieclean

Who didn’t want a Rosie growing up? Aside from the Food Machine, she was the very best part of The JetsonsA loving, caring, authoritative mother figure who helps you with your homework and keeps a perfect house? Name me one Roomba who can do that.

3. They Provide a Helpful PSA for Children About Safety

5. They Teach Us How To Love

wall

6. They Struggle to understand human emotion in a really sweet way

"My Programming May Be Inadequate to the Task"

“My Programming May Be Inadequate to the Task”

7. They Lead Us During Times of Crisis

optimus

Not only was Optimus Prime a brave and powerful leader, he was also a bit of an armchair philosopher. With such amazing lines as “Fate rarely calls upon us at a time of our choosing” and “Freedom is the right of all sentient beings“, I think I’d like to have a guy like Optimus around if nuclear war ever broke out or something. You know, if Churchill wasn’t available.

8. They Clean Up Our Streets

rob2

He might have some deep-seeded issues, but he means well.

9. They Make Really Fun Drinking Buddies

bend

Lightweights

… And finally:

Because Robots Need Love Too

I ache. Therefore I am.

I ache. Therefore I am.

Like Marvin, the loveable yet chronically depressed Paranoid Android from Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, your robot (yes, we each get our own) may too, have some trouble adjusting to the inferior intellectual capacities of earth.

This is your opportunity to do something good for humdroidmanity!! Engage your robot’s planet-size brain in a rousing game of Risk. Plan a trip to the Museum of Modern Art. Organize a round-robin Rubik’s Cube Tournament. Anything you like. Just keep him away from the E! network.

Question of the Day: What would you like to see robots do?

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19 thoughts on “10 Reasons Not to Be Afraid Of Robots

  1. A) Dan Mangan love. Nice!

    B) As much as I really liked Star Trek: TNG, I always felt uncomfortable with Data’s robotness. It was more like he was a human pretending to be a robot which would be both 1) sociopathic and 2) ultimately true.

    C) I want robots to fold all my fitted sheets because that shit’s impossible!

    • Haha ok, I agree data can be a bit creepy sometimes. But his struggle to understand humanity is just so damn endearing sometimes. Like this scene for instance:

  2. I am not worried about my job being taken by a robot, because even a robot would get bored. As long as Optimus is around I feel safe, from Decepticons, from other robots, even Skynet. And if they took over my blog it would be funnier and I could take all the credit. Also I could be lazier. Bring on the robots!

  3. This reminds me of how I need to invest in a Roomba and do the whole Parks and Rec DJ Roomba thing. If a robot would have the patience to sit and listen to me inner thoughts, make me food, and braid my hair, I would invest in one for sure.

  4. Data was pretty awesome. The only thing that freaked me out about him were his eyes and the thought of putting those contacts in every shoot. Eye issues. No robot issues here though. I’d love a house-cleaning robot. Put me down for a Rosie!

  5. This has nothing to do with robots (or does it?), but I got your mixtape!! Thank you! It’s great – a very diverse group of artists that mostly I haven’t heard of, woohoo!

  6. Hahaha! Too funny. And Mario Lopez is definitely a robot.

    I’d like a robot to go do my grocery shopping, especially right now! The fridge is emptying rapidly as we speak and I am quarantined at home *sob*

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